It was my birthday this week. I have mixed feelings about birthdays – being born on April Fools Day does that to you. But this birthday has been lovely. I received far more good wishes than usual, which confused me until I remembered that last year I’d released a track, Just 13, in which I told the world I was born on April 1st.
Listen to hear why…………
I am uncommonly poor at remembering birthdays. It’s surprising because I am savant-like at recalling other numbers. It leads to anxious guilt being my instinctive response to a birthday greeting – did I forget their birthday? Yes – is the usual answer. I’m a terrible person.
My wretchedness is compounded because I love giving presents. Missing a legitimate opportunity to show affection and appreciation hurts.
I know that if I really wanted to, I could surely come up with a system to help me remember. But I don’t want to add birthdays to my to-do list. Maybe my forgetfulness is more deliberate than I recognise – I get far more joy giving a present on a non-birthday. I retain a childish joy in doing things unexpectedly. I identify with being unexpected.
An (unexpected) solution
Here is a suggestion that would work well for me. Instead of one’s birthday being the day when you receive presents and good wishes. Why don’t we switch it around and make it the day when we give presents and good wishes?
This has two substantial benefits:
1) Instead of having to remember countless days throughout the year you could focus your gift-buying and card-sending to one time that you would never forget. Even I remember my own birth date.
2) Instead of receiving all your birthday wishes on one day you would receive them throughout the year, whenever a friend had a birthday.
It seems a much better system to me.
A Birthday Gift for You
I’ll put it into practice and wish you all a very happy birthday. Because it is my birthday!
My gift to you is a Limited Edition, Numbered, Signed copy of Together Apart to anyone who wants one (until I run out). It comes with digital versions of the book and album too. Or you can choose one of my other CDs if you already have Together Apart.
Just send me your choice and your address here.
Because I love you for listening and reading and caring.
But we both know I won’t tell you on your birthday, so I’m telling you on mine!
Yours hopefully,
Nazneen
Yours Hopefully is a weekly experiment in living hopefully. With science and song. Why not subscribe and get a post every Sunday in your inbox?